Slowly Learning How to Adjust

You know what? I guess it's time for me to learn how to adjust. I mean, I'm thinking maybe that's why I isolated myself from people or pulled myself away from everybody else almost my whole life by being the loner since time in memorial that I am is because I find it hard to adjust to people and to the kind of environment around me. Well, we moved to a new place a few months ago and I just stayed inside the subdivision most of the time and there are even days when I just don't step out of the house. I'm thinking of going back job hunting. I mean, I'm already in my mid-twenties and I'm supposed to be providing for my own self at this stage of my life. Well, maybe deep down I still feel like a fourteen year old it's just that I guess it's time for me to have some reality check or something. I mean, God gave me about three years and eight months to polish my skill in writing if I ever do have a skill in writing to begin with not to mention giving me enough time in learning how to deal with this Bipolar Disorder I have. Well, I guess it's time for me to move on. I mean, the path to recovery wasn't that easy, mind you. Hmm, damn it. LOL.

Well, even if I'll go and give job hunting another try I'm still gonna do whatever I can to keep my blog updated from time to time. I mean, I guess the dream still lives on. LOL. Well, I know things will never be the same again and I guess all I have to do from now on is simply to live with it. Hmm, my student career is somewhat over. I mean, I guess I'm not ever going back to school any time soon or maybe in my whole damn life. You know what? At some point I lost all the confidence I had and from time to time I feel like I'm incompetent for any job out there. Well, it's just that I think it's time for me bring back the confidence I had in me and then everything else will follow. I mean, I may be mentally ill but it doesn't mean that I cannot function like a normal human being. Oh, not to mention that I better be ready to accept rejections or something. Damn it.

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. LOL. You know what? It's not my problem why other creatures think the way they do so I guess the best thing for me to do is just to let those other creatures think what they want. Damn, it's not easy to come up with a blog draft, mind you. I mean, I'm really running out of nonsense to talk about. LOL. Well, maybe deep within I still feel like a fourteen year old. It's just that in my daydreams and on the world wide web maybe I'm already sixty years old or something. LOL. Hmm, in the real world I'm still twenty-five years old. Damn, why am I talking about ages? Well, maybe 'coz I'm really running out of nonsense to talk about. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. LOL. Hmm, let me think. Damn it.

You know what? I don't really have that much in mind right now. LOL. Hmm, I don't even know where this blog draft is going. It's just that I need to write a few more lines to conform to the standard requirement of writing a page of nonsense per blog draft. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I don't really have that much in mind right now. LOL. Damn, what am I saying? LOL. Well, it's just that I'd rather have nothing to write about than have my psychotic mind drop by and ruin everything. I mean, my blog is really doing good so far and I don't really need my psychotic mind to drop by and spoil everything. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I just leave other people do what they want to do with their lives. I mean, I have nothing to do with other people's lives anyway. Well, so I guess all that I can do for now is keep on keeping my blog updated as I am make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online as a stepping stone towards my dream of becoming a writer in the real world everybody knows someday. Whatever. Damn it.