I Need to Sort Out My Priorities

You know what? I'm thinking why won't I just focus more in updating my blog or something. I mean, it seems like there's really nothing for me on social networking sites. Oh, not to mention that it seems like something is wrong when it comes to turning my laptop on these days and I'm kind of worried that what if a day will come when I cannot turn my laptop on anymore which means it's a goodbye to my blogging days. I mean, if you can catch my drift. You know what? If I think it over there's really nothing for me on the world wide web so why am I so hooked into it. Damn. I mean, my blog “Mysterious Girl” by Adeline Chrystyn haven't even survived half a year and here I go having some trouble when it comes to turning my laptop on or something. Damn it. Well, I guess I better prepare myself for whatever that is that may happen or what. You know what? I haven't even started a career in writing in the real world everybody knows and it seems like I'm gonna have to say goodbye to my blogging days one of these days or something. Damn.

You know what? I'm thinking maybe none of my dreams are meant to come true in the real world everybody knows. I mean, I tried and tried but still all my efforts went into waste. Well, it's just that I don't know what those days without blogging is gonna be like or something. Damn it. Hmm, on second thought I'm thinking since my current laptop is slowly depreciating and is nearly fully depreciated I'm thinking why won't I sacrifice dropping by online for now and just save the dough instead for the sake of getting myself a new laptop and not to mention a digital camera plus a camera phone. LOL. Hmm, so it seems like you won't be hearing anything from me for about five years or something if my Math serves me right. LOL. Well, I'm still gonna keep on writing. It's just that I won't be typing my thoughts down anymore and blogging them 'coz it seems like I'm gonna go back to the old school way which is scribbling my thoughts down on a piece of paper which is not that bad after all even if I don't really like my current handwriting.

Damn, saying goodbye to my blogging days feels like one of the hardest goodbyes. LOL. Well, let's put it this way. Hmm, if I can still manage to update my blog from time to time then it means my laptop is still carrying on but if you won't be hearing anything from me anymore for like ages then it only means my laptop finally can't carry on anymore. Well, look at the bright side. I mean, at least I managed writing 97,500 words of nonsense before my laptop will soon say goodbye for good. Well, in all fairness I can say that my blog book “Mysterious Girl” by Adeline Chrystyn is one of the best works of art that I have ever came up with my whole damn life and maybe my journey when it comes to writing this blog book will soon come to an end for now but hopefully will resume in about five years time. LOL. I mean, God has given me three years, nine months, and five days to make my dreams or shall I say frustrations or better yet foolishness come true even just inside the four walls of my room and I guess it's more than enough for me. I guess so.

You know what? I'm thinking why won't I get myself busy by reading the books in my mini-library. I mean, I guess that will make the whole damn world a better place to live in. Oh, not to mention that it seems like I don't really have a future when it comes to being a writer in the real world everybody knows someday so might as well just settle as a reader or something. I mean, for now. LOL. You know what? It seems like the reason why I'm a bit hooked to dropping by online is because it's where I get the chance to live the artistic side of me or something. Damn, what am I saying? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Oh, now I came to think what if a break from blogging and reading the books in mini-library for the mean time will make me a better writer in the future or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn it. Well, I don't really know.

Days Without Dropping By Online

Well, for the past few days I was able to access my social networking account for free as a Christmas and New Year's gift from the network provider or something. LOL. Hmm, it's just that it seems like the fun is over from now on 'coz when I tried to log in my social networking account carrying my pen name “Adeline Chrystyn” a while ago it seems like something went wrong with the web page or something and don't ask me to describe it much further 'coz I just can't put my words into it. LOL. Well, so it seems like I'm going back to those days when I only get the chance to drop by online whenever I have written my latest batch of blog drafts to be posted on my blog or something. Hmm, can you catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Well, I don't really know with me. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know.

By the way, there's this song by the Twerking Queen that's giving me an LSS or a Last Song Syndrome. Well, I actually cannot relate to the song not to mention that I cannot dedicate this said song to somebody else. I mean, I was just caught by the song's melody not to mention that I ended up liking the song even more when I saw a video of the Twerking Queen on a video sharing website singing the said song live on a talk show. Oh, and when I checked out the lyrics I ended up liking it even more 'coz I find it a bit poetic or something. Well, all I can say is I had pleasant chills running down my spine while watching that live performance of this said song by the Twerking Queen. Oh, not to mention that that live performance made me forget all the ‘weird’ things the Twerking Queen has been doing in her latest music videos and not to mention her ‘twerking’ making me realize that the Twerking Queen is really a talented singer and she doesn’t have to do all those ‘weird’ things or shall I say go through all the ‘hype’ just to go further in the mainstream music industry ‘coz her amazing singing voice with an amazing song is more than enough to make her shine. Okay, I know no one asked for my opinion. I mean, I'm just saying.

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. Oh, I decided to drop saving in five pesos coin denomination and stick with saving in ten pesos coin denomination. I mean, with the rise of e-books these days I wonder if it's a good idea to have a books in print yard sale someday. Well, I don't really know. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Oh, call me old school but I still opt to read books that are in print. I mean, I grew up doing so and I'm thinking it's gonna stay that way until my time in this world of the living is up. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. LOL.

By the way, I tried to sing this song that's giving me an LSS. Well, it was a bit of a challenge to familiarize the words of the song to begin with but with a lot of perseverance I was able to familiarize myself with the words of the song and I just ended up singing the song over and over again not to mention that there are even times when I can't get myself into sleep 'coz late at night the song is still playing in my head. LOL. Oh, again I'd like to stress out that I actually cannot relate to the song not to mention that I cannot think of somebody to dedicate it to. I mean, maybe the song is just too catchy for me that's why I'm so hooked to it these days. Well, if you can catch my drift. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something. Well, I guess the best thing for me to do is just to keep on updating my blog to make the whole damn world a better place to live in and that's an amen.

Here I Go Flooding the News Feed

Hmm, so I have been liking photos of people on a social networking site and I have a funny feeling that I'm flooding the news feed of my friends on the said social networking site all over again. Well, I'm thinking maybe it's not such a big deal to them or something but if it somehow annoys them or what then they are free to stop receiving updates from me in their news feed or something. LOL. Well, actually I turned this said social networking site into a quasi micro-blogging website a few years ago by sending status updates via text message. LOL. Hmm, and now it seems like I'm turning this said social networking site into a photo sharing website or something. Well, it's just that I don't really have that much photos to share. By the way, I logged in to some of my deactivated accounts on this said social networking site yesterday to check out some old photos I uploaded back then and saved some of those photos then deactivated those said accounts all over again. I mean, this account carrying the name “Adeline Chrystyn” is really the official one and I'm trying my damn best to be mature in this account or something unlike before.

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. LOL. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. By the way, yesterday I had Macaroni Salad for breakfast then I had Macaroni Salad for lunch then I had Macaroni Salad and Spaghetti for dinner. LOL. Well, never mind asking why I had Macaroni Salad for the whole day. Hmm, all I can say is it's been a year since then. Okay, so why won't I talk about something else? Hmm, like what? Well, I don't really know. By the way, natural calamities are happening not just in this country where I live and grew up in but also in the whole wide world if I base it on what I have seen on my news feed on a social networking site not to mention that here goes the topic of this so called “End of the World” all over again. Well, no one really knows when the whole damn world will end. Hmm, I guess the best thing for each and every one of us to do is to make the most out of each and every single day or something. Damn, look who's talking? LOL. I mean, I can't even live my life to the fullest or what. Damn it.

Oh, it seems like none of those pending friend requests that I sent will ever get accepted. Well, I still have thirty friends on a social networking site and not counting. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Hmm, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something. You know what? I think I'm going through some diminishing satisfaction when it comes to social networking sites. I mean, it's like eating Chocolates or something. Hmm, at first one gets a lot of satisfaction when eating Chocolates but the more one eats some Chocolates the lesser satisfaction one gets from eating Chocolates. I mean, can you catch my drift or wasn't I listening to our Economics teacher back then attentively? LOL. Oh, and why did I decide to make Chocolates as an example when if you ask me I'll never get tired of eating Chocolates? Damn it.

You know what? I'm thinking social networking sites are a new medium of communication aside from being a platform for self-expression. Well, since no one out there really wants to talk to me then I'm thinking I'll go with making social networking sites a platform for expressing myself or something. LOL. By the way, I watched a reality show for designers last night and one of the guest judges is a female model. Hmm, so I went and checked her out on a social networking site and when I checked out her photos it seems like this female model is also an author of a book with a pink cover or something. LOL. Damn, so she's a professional model and a professional author which are both I'm not. Oh, another heartbreak this is. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. LOL. I mean, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. Damn it.

Talking to a Fictitious Character

You know what? I don't know why but I have a funny feeling that when I was chatting to Sam Keanu Neuryc back then I was talking to a fictitious character all along. Hmm, I don't know with me. I mean, not to mention that he's keeping such a low profile. Well, I'm thinking maybe what happened during my chatting days to Sam Keanu Neuryc was all a case study or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Hmm, so I guess it's time for me to move on or something. Oh, not to mention that it's been ages since he deleted me as friend on a social networking account carrying my real name. Damn, I wonder what's up with him these days? Well, I'm talking about that guy I saw via webcam. I mean, I'm kind of wondering if that guy I saw via webcam is the real Sam Keanu Neuryc or not or was he just an accessory to the case study or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Well, I guess it's all part of God's plan and that's an amen. Damn it.

By the way, I spent the past few days browsing through photos on a social networking site. Well, if you wanna check out the photos I like then just try out the graph search and type down “Photos liked by Adeline Chrystyn” or some other keywords with the same meaning. I mean, if you can catch my drift. You know what? It seems like I'll be an unemployed not to mention unemployable my whole damn life and I'll never get the chance to know what it's like to start earning my own dough. Damn it. Well, I'm still saving in ten pesos coin denomination in my coin bank. Hmm, it's just that I don't know if this time around it's for the sake of saving or for a digital camera. I mean, I'm thinking of unleashing the frustrated photographer in me or something. LOL. Well, I don't really know. Hmm, I'm thinking that's not such a bad idea. I mean, there's a possibility that I'll compile my photos in a coffee table book and make some dough out of it or something. Damn it.

Oh, I'm still not done reading this book about dreams and what dreamers end up doing just to make their dreams come true. You know what? I'm thinking I don't really have a way with words. LOL. Damn, and here I go dreaming to be a writer. Oh, not to mention that not just a writer but a bestselling one. Damn, who the hell will spare some of one's hard earned dough just to read all the rubbish in the world coming from an ignorant girl like me? Hmm, why won't I just keep on writing? I mean, I guess that will make the world a better place to live in. LOL. You know what? I'm thinking there are artists who are born and there are also artists who are made. I feel like I can express myself better through art. Hmm, it's just that I'm not as good as renaissance artists are so it seems like the wanna-be artist in me still has a lot of work to do or something which is not as easy as one-two-three, mind you. Well, it seems like the steps I took to be a singer songwriter someday are a total epic fail and I guess it's much better for me to just drop that dream. Damn it.

Hmm, I'm still keeping my blog though even if the steps I took to be a published writer someday are also an epic fail. I mean, I really opt to express myself through writing rather than talking. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Hmm, I wonder how will I do when it comes to photography. Well, I don't really know. By the way, I now have thirty friends on a social networking site and it seems like none of those pending friend requests I sent are gonna be accepted in the coming days. Oh, I decided to sort out those friends again. Hmm, I decided to fuse those who are in family, close friends, and interesting friends into one group which I named simply as “friends” then the rest are still “acquaintances”. You know what? I think I'm gonna give photography a shot. Well, I don't know with me. Hmm, it's just that I still don't have a single penny in my pocket to buy myself a digital camera. LOL. I mean, if I can't start earning my own dough through writing then maybe I can start earning my own dough through being a frustrated photographer or something. Well, I don't really know. I mean, I'm just wondering if someone out there will appreciate any work of art coming from me or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn it. Whatever.

Hold Back the Gossip Girl in Me

I browsed through my grade school and high school yearbooks then made a list of those that I'm thinking of sending friend requests to on a social networking site. Hmm, it's just that I'm thinking it's not a good idea to send more friend requests to people on a social networking site for now. Well, I don't really know. I mean, I'm thinking of sending a message to those who left my friend requests pending telling them that my account carrying the name “Adeline Chrystyn” is the official one or something hoping for them to accept my friend requests 'coz I really want to be updated with what's going on in their lives these days. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn, it seems like I can't hold back the gossip girl in me or something. LOL. Well, actually I initially listed down only fifteen people to whom I will send a friend request to on a social networking site. Hmm, that includes two cousins then two friends I met way back grade school then eight friends I met way back high school then three friends I met way back college. Well, I'd like to stress out that I'm not really that close to any one of them. Hmm, I guess I just want to have a glimpse and be updated with what's going on in their lives these days or something. Well, I want to add my sister too. Hmm, it's just that I know she'll never accept any friend request coming from me so I decided to just drop the idea. LOL. Well, we see each other everyday anyway. LOL.

Hmm, so it seems like I just wasted my time browsing through my yearbooks and listing down to whom I'm thinking of sending friend requests to. Well, maybe in the coming days I'm gonna go and add them or maybe I won't. Well, I don't really know. I mean, I'm just thinking what if they don't wanna be friends with me anymore even on a social networking site. Well, how will I find out if I won't send a friend request, right? I mean, it's like waiting for somebody to talk to you again when that said somebody is also waiting for you to start a conversation. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn, I wonder what happened to the poem and book proposal I sent via e-mail or something. Well, I guess it's much better for me not to think too much about it. I mean, it's only stressing me out or something. You know what? It's really sad that I won't be able to keep on promoting my lyric video for “A Broken Record” on a social networking site 'coz I deactivated that account in which I kept on promoting it. I mean, it only means I won't be able to make my Christmas wish come true or something. Well, I guess that's life and I better live with it. Damn it.

You know what? I'm still starting off a career as a writer these days but why is it that I feel like I'm in this journey my whole damn life. Well, maybe because this dream started when I was eight and I have been trying to write a book since then. Damn, I don't really know where this path I'm choosing is going. Oh, not to mention that it's not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. Well, as they say that there's no such thing as an overnight success. I mean, if I'm climbing a mountain then it seems like I'm still at the bottom of it. I mean, it's like I haven't even started climbing yet. Damn, how can I say that when I have been trying to write a book since I was eight? Well, I don't really know with me. Damn, forget about it. Sigh.

Well, maybe I'm talking about being a writer in the real world. I mean, I'm still living my dream of being a writer even just inside the four walls of my room. Well, I sent a poem and a book proposal which seems like a step towards making it in the real world or something. Hmm, it's just that it seems like my poem and book proposal don't stand a chance in making it in the publishing industry. I mean, who the hell will put one's confidence on an amateur and take the risk? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I feel like I made a fool out of myself for sending that poem and that book proposal. Well, it's a step towards making my dreams come true so I just thought of giving it a shot. Oh, not to mention that this is just the starting point. I mean, I'm thinking there will be more making-a-fool-out-of-myself feelings in the days to come. Well, I guess this is part of my dream and it seems like the best thing for me to do is just to live with it making it an amen.

Invest in Books or Save the Dough

Well, since I like reading good books then I'm thinking of browsing for good books in a secondhand bookshop, read those books I found interesting and bought, then sell those books I have read in a book yard sale. Well, on second thought there's a part of me telling me why won't I just save the dough instead. Hmm, I don't really know. You know what? I don't really need a new gadget. I mean, my laptop can still function properly even if it's slowly depreciating not to mention that my mobile phone can also still function properly even if it is also slowly depreciating. You know what? Well, I'm thinking since I'm unemployed not to mention unemployable then I guess it's much better for me to focus more on my needs and not on my wants. Oh, it's just that I don't know with me but I find dropping by online to update my blog from time to time a need 'coz it's my ticket to establishing myself as a writer and all that stuff.

You know what? I'm thinking of dropping by online on every Sunday from now on or something. Oh, not to mention that if I'm not mistaken I'm writing this blog draft on a Tuesday and Sunday feels like ages away or what. LOL. By the way, the time and date settings of my laptop and my mobile phone are broken. Hmm, nothing much. I mean, I just feel like mentioning that one. Well, so I'm thinking of saving some dough in five pesos coin denomination to invest in good books aside from saving some dough in ten pesos coin denomination for the sake of saving. By the way. I'm still in the middle of reading this book about dreamers and what dreamers end up doing just to make their dreams come true. Well, so while I'm still saving some dough to invest in good books then I guess the best thing for me to do is just to read all over again the books in my mini-library which is not that bad after all. You know what? I don't really know why I'm so into books. Damn.

Oh, not to mention that I read in an online article that reading makes somebody a better writer. Hmm, I guess that does make a lot of sense, right? Well, so it seems like I'm writing too much these days that I end up coming up with my latest batch of blog drafts in less than a week so I'm thinking of unleashing the artist within me and come up with artistic stuffs while waiting for the coming Sunday. I mean, if you can catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Well, I don't really know. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Hmm, I wonder what happened to the e-mail messages I sent or something. Well, I don't really know. I mean, I still have to wait until this coming Sunday to find out and it damn really feels like ages from now or something. Oh, not to mention that I have a funny feeling that I'll be waiting in vain or what. Hmm, I guess that's life and the best thing for me to do is just to live with it. Damn, what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't know. LOL.

You know what? I'm really running out of nonsense out here. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Hmm, on second thought I only live once so I'm wondering why would I waste time waiting for the coming Sunday to update my blog or something. Well, I don't really know with me. Hmm, why won't I just limit myself to writing a blog draft a day or something. I mean, I guess that will make the whole damn word a better place to live in. Well, I don't really know. Damn it. You know what? I have a lot of ideas going on in my head these days. Hmm, I don't know with me. I mean, take the book yard sale as a sample or something. Hmm, it's just that it seems like these ideas will remain as ideas for now since I don't have a single penny in my pocket to turn those ideas into something real. Well, I'm thinking it's much better for me not to think too much of these ideas I have in mind. I mean, I guess everything will just fall into place someday or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn, what the heck am I saying?

No One Asked for What I Think

By the way, I was able to accidentally discover that my broadband can also function as a memory card reader. Hmm, nothing much. I mean, I just feel like mentioning that one. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. I mean, I really have nothing much in mind right now. Hmm, I just feel like writing so here I am coming up with another blog draft. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. You know what? I'm kind of wondering what happened to the e-mail messages I sent. Well, I don't really know and I don't know when will I ever find out. Hmm, I haven't written a new poem yet. I mean, it seems like those once in a blue moon poem writing sessions is out of town these days or something. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? It just dawned on me that the home buddy that I am stayed stuck in my cave where I peacefully belong for months now. I mean, if you can catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Well, whatever. Damn it.

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something. You know what? I really can't wait to drop by online. Hmm, it's just that it seems like I have to wait until I'll be able to come up with the next batch of blog drafts or something. You know what? I'm kind of thinking why won't I start blogging something that makes some sense or what. I mean, I'm thinking maybe my readers if I ever do have some are sick and tired of me babbling the same things over and over again or something. Well, I don't really know. You know what? I'm thinking maybe that's why I haven't received any critique when it comes to my writing style since I began carrying my pen name “Adeline Chrystyn” is because no one ever bothered to read any of my blog posts or something. Well, I don't really know. Damn.

Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I'm thinking the reason why I just can't wait to drop by online is because I can't wait to check out if I have received a reply from the local newspaper and publishing company to whom I sent a poem and a book proposal to respectively. Damn, I'm thinking I'll just be waiting in vain or something. Well, not to mention that it seems like I sent those e-mail messages in such a wrong timing and I don't feel like going into the details why. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something. You know what? I'm sounding like a broken record all over again. Damn, whatever.

You know what? I guess the best thing for me to do is really to keep on blogging while I'm still clueless on what am I gonna do in the real world everybody knows. Well, teaching in college will do. Hmm, it's just that I'm really not qualified not to mention that I don't have the brains and I don't have the heart. Oh, not to mention that I don't know what subject am I gonna teach in college or something if I ever do get the chance to go back to school or what. Hmm, on second thought I'm not really an intellectual 'coz I'm an artist. LOL. Well, a wanna-be artist that is. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. You know what? I have written 97,500 words of nonsense which means a chapter of my journey towards a career in writing has been closed and now it's time for me to start a new chapter or something. You know what? I don't really know where this path I'm choosing is going.

Over-Thinking Too Much About It

Hmm, so I went online a few hours ago and then sent a book proposal via e-mail to a publishing company that is based in this country where I live in. Well, I thought why would I over-think too much about sending a book proposal when I have nothing to lose anyway. You know what? I have to say that this publishing company that I'm talking about is the only hope I have and it really sucks to keep reminding myself not to keep my hopes high 'coz if my book proposal will get rejected then it will totally be heartbreaking or something. By the way, I browsed through my news feed on a social networking site and noticed that my newly-wed cousin has uploaded wedding photos. Well, I just thought of mentioning that one. Oh, not to mention that I tried to write a poem yesterday. Hmm, it's just that it seems like those once in a blue moon poem writing sessions aren't in town these days so here I am coming up with another blog draft. Well, so I guess what I have to do for now is to wait for a reply to my e-mail messages or will I be waiting in vain or something. Hmm, I don't really know. Well, I guess it's much better for me not to think too much about it or what. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't know. LOL.

Well, let's just say it's time to close another chapter in my journey towards a career in writing or something. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. You know what? It's really not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. I mean, I'm really running out of nonsense out here. By the way, I'm still thinking of sending a query to literary agents. Well, I don't really know. I mean, since my chance to promote my lyric video of my song “A Broken Record” on social networking sites finally came to an end then I don't know what else to do on the remaining internet minutes after updating my blog or something. Hmm, can you catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Well, I don't really know. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn, what am I saying? Damn it.

Hmm, so I sent my poem “A Broken Record” to a local newspaper via e-mail and I sent a book proposal via e-mail to a publishing company that is based in this country where I live in as a next step towards achieving my dream of becoming a writer in the real world everybody knows. Well, I don't know if I'll receive a reply or what and I don't wanna think too much about it. I mean, I guess the best thing for me to do is simply to keep on writing. Hmm, I did my part and I guess it's up to God to do the rest. Well, so I guess for now I'm gonna keep on updating my blog book as I am make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online. Damn, I feel like I'm sounding like a broken record all over again or something. LOL. You know what? I'm thinking since a mobile phone is really pointless in my case aside from taking photos plus videos and listening to music then I'm thinking why won't I just save some dough to invest in a digital camera. Damn it.

Well, so it seems like here I go thinking twice and thrice all over again. I mean, if my memory serves me right I'm supposed to save up some dough to invest in a business or something. Hmm, so I'm gonna go and wait for at least two months for a reply from those I sent an e-mail message to though I'm not keeping my hopes high or something but I'm really praying for the best or something. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. You know what? In all fairness my blog has better statistics than my lyric video of my song “A Broken Record” on the video sharing website where I uploaded it. Oh, and to think I don't promote my blog and on the other hand gave all my best efforts in promoting my lyric video of my song “A Broken Record”. Hmm, I'm kind of wondering if is it a sign from God or something. Well, I don't really know. Damn, whatever.

Starting Off With My Poems

I went online a few hours ago to update my blog and then I decided to send my poem “A Broken Record” to a local newspaper via e-mail. Well, I guess it's time for me to face my fear of failure or something though I'm still wishing that the local newspaper will decide to publish my poem in the coming Saturdays. By the way, I did some further research about sending a query to literary agents and if I'm not mistaken I read something like a literary agent is somebody a writer hires to represent one's work to publishing companies. Well, I'm just troubled with the term “hire” because if I'm not mistaken it means the writer has to pay the literary agent for one's services whether or not the writer's book gets published or not. Well, I don't really have a single penny in my pocket for me to hire a literary agent so might as well just forget about sending a query to literary agents or something. Hmm, I'm thinking of sending a book proposal to this publishing company that's based in this country where I live in. Well, I don't really know with me. Damn it.

You know what? I'm really thinking of awakening the poet within me if there ever is a poet within me to begin with and start off my career as a writer by sending my poems to a local newspaper. Hmm, I think that will make the whole damn world a better place to live in. LOL. Well, problem is since I began carrying my pen name “Adeline Chrystyn” I have written only two poems so far and those poems are “A Broken Record” and “Shrug It Off” though these “poems” can also be considered as “songs” 'coz the words and melody were hand in hand popping out of my head when those once in a blue moon song writing sessions dropped by or something. Hmm, can you catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Damn it. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Hmm, whatever. LOL.

By the way, I'm still in the middle of reading this book about dreams and what dreamers end up doing just to make their dreams come true. Well, it seems like I'm being such a slow reader these days, huh? LOL. Oh, not to mention that when I went job hunting online a few days ago I bumped into classifieds looking for article writers or something. Well, problem is the office is located in my old city not to mention that I'm not really an article writer. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Damn, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something. You know what? It's not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. LOL. Hmm, I don't know when will I send another poem to a local newspaper. Well, I don't even know if I will or I won't. Hmm, I don't really know with me. LOL.

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? I'm thinking in the real world everybody knows why won't I establish myself as a poet to begin with and then everything else will follow. Well, I don't really know. By the way, I have reached the quota which is to write 97,500 words of nonsense but it doesn't mean that I'll stop documenting my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between 'coz news is I'm still gonna keep on going. LOL. Hmm, I'm thinking of writing poems in the coming days. Well, that if those once in a blue moon poem writing sessions will drop by or something. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? I'm kind of thinking that a few sentences or a paragraph that makes a lot of sense is way much better than a whole page of nonsense. LOL. Hmm, it's just that I feel like sticking to writing a page of nonsense in every blog draft or something. LOL. Well, I guess that's just me and the best thing for me to do is just to live with it. LOL. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Damn, what am I saying? Hmm, whatever. LOL.

I'm So Stuck In My Own Dreams

I was daydreaming last night as a lullaby to sleep and I was like it seems like my daydreams are gonna remain as daydreams until my time in this world of the living is up. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I'm thinking maybe it's time for me to stop living my dreams or shall I say frustrations even just inside the four walls of my room. I'm thinking it's time for me to try to make my dreams or shall I say frustrations come true in the real world everybody knows. Well, problem is am I ready for whatever that is that comes along with making my dreams or shall I say frustrations come true. Damn, I don't really know. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Damn, what am I saying? Well, I don't know with me.

You know what? I think I'm gonna go and wait until December. Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? I don't really have that much in mind right now. I mean, I just feel like writing so here I am coming up with another blog draft. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? It's not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. I mean, not to mention that I'm such a boring person living such a super boring life. You know what? I'm thinking of touring around the city where I grew up in and document my travels. Well, I know it sounds weird 'coz I'm talking about the city where I grew up in which means I'm already familiar with the place and it's like there's nothing new to discover. Hmm, on second thought touring around the city where I grew up in can wait since I don't have a digital camera to document my travels not to mention that I don't have a single penny in my pocket to do so. Hmm, so might as well just stay stuck inside my cave where I peacefully belong for now. LOL. Damn, so it seems like being unemployed has infinite downsides, huh?

Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? I'm really thinking of sending some of my poems to a local newspaper. I mean, I really sense no harm in it. Hmm, it's just that I'm kind of wondering why is there a part of me telling me that it's not such a good idea. Well, I don't know with me. Damn it. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. You know what? It seems like I'm just repeating the same things over and over again or something. Well, it's just that I really don't have that much in mind right now. By the way, I'll really appreciate it if my readers if I ever do have some will send me a critique when it comes to my writing style. LOL. Hmm, or why won't I just join a writing workshop instead or something.

You know what? I guess the best thing for me to do is just to keep on doing what I'm doing even if I don't know if what I'm doing is going somewhere or what. Damn, I'm sounding like a broken record all over again. LOL. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. You know what? I'm thinking of starting off a business or something even if I know I'm not a business-minded kind of person. Well, I don't really know. Hmm, I guess the best thing for me to do for now is to keep on updating my blog book as I am make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online or something. Damn, I guess that will make the whole damn world a better place to live in. You know what? I have a funny feeling that I really sound like a broken record in this blog draft or something. Well, I guess that's just me and the best thing for me to do is just to live with it. Damn, I wonder if have I written 97,500 words of nonsense by now. Well, I don't really know. You know what? I really sense no harm in sending a query to literary agents. Damn.

Something New to the Table

You know what? I have a funny feeling that my readers if I ever do have some are sick and tired of me babbling nothing but my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between so I'm kind of thinking of offering something new to the table like being a travel blogger possibly since it seems like I'm a home buddy who wants to travel. Damn, it's just that how am I gonna be able to do that not to mention that I don't have a single penny in my pocket to do so. Oh, to add to that I also don't have a digital camera in which I can take photos and videos to document my travels or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Hmm, so I guess for now I'll stay as an amateur writer documenting or shall I say babbling about my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between which is not that bad after all. I mean, if you ask me I really don't have any problem with that. Well, it's just that I don't know with those on the other side of the coin and I'm talking about my readers if I ever do have some. Hmm, what am I saying? Damn it.

Well, on second thought the frustrated writer in me wants my blog to be all words for now which means my blog doesn't have any room for photos and videos from my travels if I ever do get the chance to travel. Hmm, I'm thinking maybe I'll just upload the photos on a photo sharing website and upload the videos on a video sharing website to make the whole damn world a better place to live in. You know what? I'm thinking it's really advisable for an artist to invest in a digital camera. Oh, and it doesn't have to be those expensive not to mention bulky digital cameras. I mean, I'm talking about those affordable and handy digital cameras that anyone can just keep inside one's shoulder bag or something. Well, problem is I still can't afford even the most affordable handy digital cameras out in the market these days. By the way, this 4^th of November 2013 I ended up shedding five coins in my coin bank to have a taste of a Brownie Flavoured Ice Cream coated with Belgian Chocolate and Cashew Nuts. Well, it's not everyday that I can have one anyway so go ahead and judge me. LOL. Damn, I want Chocolate Cake for Christmas. LOL.

You know what? I know I'm not really that good when it comes to researching on search engines but I'm thinking of doing the best I can to search for home-based writing jobs or something. I mean, I'm really a home buddy and I'm thinking it's really best for me to work from home or what. Hmm, or why won't I just go and send some of my poems to a local newspaper? I mean, who knows what if a poem I wrote will make it for publication and then the local newspaper decides to pay me for my contribution or something. Well, I don't really know. Damn, it seems like I'm repeating the same things over and over again. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. Damn it. LOL. Oh, maybe I'll go and send a query to literary agents by January of next year. Well, I don't really know. I mean, it seems like my fear of failure is damn resurfacing again.

Hmm, I guess it's much better for me to forget about being a travel blogger for now. Oh, not to mention that I don't have a single penny in my pocket to do so. Hmm, I don't even have a digital camera to document my travels to begin with. You know what? I'm still thinking of dropping by a professional photo studio to have a photo of myself by a professional photographer. Hmm, or why won't I just drop the idea not to mention that I also don't have a single penny in my pocket to do so. You know what? Some friends I met way back high school that I added on my social networking account carrying my official pen name “Adeline Chrystyn” still left my friend requests pending. Well, as a Christmas wish I hope these high school friends that I'm talking about will accept my friend requests some time soon. Hmm, or maybe that's why these high school friends that I'm talking about still left my friend requests pending is because they don't wanna be friends with me anymore. Well, I don't really know. Oh, not to mention that I'm not really close to any of them or basically to anyone in this whole wide world to begin with. LOL.

A Home Buddy Wants to Travel

I may be a home buddy but I have to say that one of the many things that I want to do in my bucket list is to travel all around the world. Oh, not to mention documenting my travels at the same time. LOL. Well, problem is I can't do that for now 'coz obviously I don't have a single penny in my pocket for me to do so. You know what? I'm kind of wondering why am I often saying “I don't have a single penny in my pocket.” when I can simply say “I'm broke.”. I mean, if you know what I mean or shall I say if you can catch my drift. LOL. Well, so I guess being unemployed has infinite downsides, huh? You know what? I'm thinking of keeping on saving in my coin bank in ten pesos coin denomination to buy a new camera phone. Hmm, on second thought I know someone here who is planning to buy oneself a new mobile phone sometime soon so I'm kind of wishing that that someone will consider to give me one's old camera phone. LOL.

You know what? I'm kind of thinking before touring around the whole wide world why won't I kick off touring around my own country or something. I mean, in all fairness I have to say that I live in such a beautiful country, mind you. Well, it's just that before anything else I need a digital camera in which I can do some video recording aside from taking photos for me to document my travels. LOL. By the way, the last time I dropped by online I bumped into a headline on a search engine's homepage saying that teenagers these days are somewhat staying away from social networking sites. Well, thing is I didn't bother to read the whole article so I don't really know what the whole story is all about. Oh, speaking of social networking sites. I mean, since my late teenage years I just added anyone as friend on my social networking accounts even if I don't know that person in person. Well, maybe I was just so bored with life so I went playing around by adding as many people as I can on my social networking accounts not to mention that it's not really such a big deal 'coz it only takes a few seconds to add a person or something. Hmm, damn.

Well, there came a time when I deactivated my old social networking accounts then created a new one and I decided to only add those that I went to school with. Oh, it's just that this said social networking account got hacked by bullies so I ended up deleting this social networking account that I'm talking about. Well, when I began carrying my pen name Adeline Chrystyn I created a social networking account carrying my pen name then I only added a few of my cousins and a few friends way back grade school, high school, and college. Oh, these said cousins, said friends, and I aren't really close. I mean, I decided to add these said cousins and said friends because they were the only ones who leaves a mark while I am growing up as a person not to mention that I also want to be updated on what's going on in their lives these days. Well, if you can catch my drift. Well, most of them accepted my friend request. Hmm, it's just that some of them did not.

Damn, why am I going off topic all over again? I mean, I'm supposed to write about being the home buddy that I am wanting to travel all around the world. Hmm, on second thought wanting to travel all around the world is just a want and it's not a need at all so why won't I just drop the idea for now. By the way, I'm thinking of joining a writing workshop. You know what? I think it's much better for me to take short term workshops or courses or seminars than to study graduate school. I mean, it's like taking up a two-week workshop on Painting or something instead of taking up Fine Arts or what. Oh, or it's like taking up a two-week workshop on Writing instead of taking up Creative Writing or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Oh, not to mention that it's much better if the workshops are for free considering that I don't have a single penny in my pocket or something. I mean, I'm just scared what if I go back to graduate school then my psychotic mind will drop by again then I'll end up dropping out of school in the last minute or something. Well, so I'm thinking might as well take short term workshops instead . Hmm, damn.

An Uncertain Path to Take

Well, it's All Souls' Day and the home buddy that I am still opt to stay stuck inside my cave where I peacefully belong. Hmm, I went online a few hours ago to check on a social networking site if my cousin who just got married uploaded wedding photos. Well, it turns out that she didn't so far so it seems like I just ended up wasting my time. Hmm, so I went checking out who among my friends on the said social networking site was online at that time and greeted them a “Happy Halloween”. Well, I know it's kind of late 'coz Halloween is supposed to be on the night of the 31^st of October towards midnight if I'm not mistaken. LOL. By the way, I also uploaded on a micro-blogging website that black and white photo I came up with last Thursday if I'm not mistaken and wrote something like when my time in this world of the living is up I want to be remembered as a complicated girl who once lived in a simple world. LOL. Hmm, whatever. LOL.

You know what? I really sense no harm in sending a query to literary agents by December or something so why is there a part of me telling me that it's not such a good idea. Well, maybe 'coz it's my fear of failure resurfacing all over again. I mean, what if literary agents won't see any potential in my work of art or something and just throw in the trash what I worked hard for in the past few months? Damn, won't that be so heartbreaking? Oh, not to mention that I'm not writing a book that has a beginning, a middle, and an end just like what novels are supposed to be according to the online articles that I have read. Well, on second thought my blog book “Mysterious Girl” by Adeline Chrystyn is not a novel to begin with. I mean, my blog book or shall I say my work of art is simply a written document of my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between since I began carrying my pen name “Adeline Chrystyn” last June.

You know what? I'm still thinking of sending some of my poems to a local newspaper. Well, it's just that problem is I have a funny feeling that it's not such a good idea. Oh, not to mention that I don't really know if I'm ready for criticisms especially for those not-so-constructive criticisms expressed in a barbaric way. You know what? I guess the best thing for me to do is to keep on blogging even if I don't know where what I'm doing is going. By the way, a college friend asked me through chat on a social networking site a few hours ago if am I thinking of going back to school and proceed to another business-related course. Well, I told her that I'm not interested. Hmm, those weren't really the exact words of our conversation but I guess the thought is there. LOL. I mean, as I've said I really feel like I don't belong in the corporate world. You know what? I'm kind of thinking since there's no such thing as a Creative Writing course in this country where I live in then the course in college closest to Writing that I can think of is no other than Literature.

Well, the problem with Literature is that I don't really feel like studying someone else's work of art. I mean, it's like I'm not really that interested in studying Shakespeare or whoever that is. Well, let's put it this way. I mean, it's like studying Music in grade school and high school. Hmm, it's like teachers and books discuss about Classical Music, Baroque Music, Contemporary Music, and whatever that is which I'm not a bit interested in 'coz my ideal kind of class in Music is for students to be taught how to play musical instruments like guitar, piano, bass, drums, violin, and what not. Oh, not to mention forming groups or bands then students get the chance to write their own songs plus play them in a mini-concert inside the school campus and stuffs like that. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Oh, or much better come up with a record album as a project for the finals or something. LOL. Hmm, it's just that I know I'm a fool enough to be idealistic especially in today's modern world or what. Oh, not to mention that who am I to suggest a new curriculum for Music in grade school and high school. LOL. Well, I'm thinking maybe some people will go and tell me if that's the case why didn't I just went into a conservatory then. LOL. Hmm, damn it.

Sweat it Out for My Blog Book

You know what? I'm thinking of dropping my seventy-page book project “Heartbroken Girl” and just focus on keeping my blog book “Mysterious Girl” updated from time to time. I mean, in the process of writing “Heartbroken Girl” I ended up realizing that I'm just repeating the same things in “Mysterious Girl” over and over again not to mention that I'm sick and tired of being such a prisoner of the past sounding like a broken record. Well, on second thought I think I don't have what it takes to work on two projects at the same time. I mean, it's just like being a working student. Well, what I'm trying to say is I can't pursue my studies and be employed as an office staff in a company all at the same time. I mean, it's like working in an office during daytime and going to classes in the early evening or something. Well, in my case I have to choose between the two so it's either I'll drop out of school or I'll resign from my work or something. Damn, what am I saying? Hmm, so it seems like I need to drop “Heartbroken Girl” and focus more in writing my blog book “Mysterious Girl”. I mean, to think of it Halloween break is almost over. Damn it.

I'm writing this blog draft on a Wednesday before Halloween and it seems like I'll be posting my latest batch of blog drafts by Friday or by Saturday or by Sunday. Well, I don't really know. By the way, I'm in the middle of reading this book about dreamers and what dreamers end up doing just to make their dreams come true. Oh, I'm also thinking of dropping by a mall to buy a memory card reader. Oh, not to mention that I'm still thinking twice if I'll send any of my poems to a local newspaper or something. Well, I don't really know with me. Hmm, so it seems like my blog book “Mysterious Girl” is something that I'll get busy with for the rest of my life or shall I say until my time here in this world of the living is up. Damn, I don't really know if the internet is here to stay until the end of time or will it be a thing of the past centuries or millenniums from now. I mean, considering that technology is getting more and more advance by the minute. Oh, not to mention that I'm kind of wondering what if a book in print will be extinct in the coming future due to the rise of e-books. Damn, if you ask me a book in print is one of greatest inventions of all time.

Well, I'd like to think that posting my blog drafts here on my blog won't lessen the chances of my blog book to turn into a published book someday. Oh, not to mention that I'm thinking of limiting myself to writing a blog draft a day in the coming days. By the way, it’s been a while since I made some sketches and it seems like my talent in making sketches is a bit rusty these days or something. Well, I was thinking of buying some pencils, a sketch pad, and some coloring materials. Hmm, it’s just that problem is I don’t have a single penny in my pocket for me to do that. You know what? I’m thinking why won’t I just take photographs instead. I mean, maybe at the back of my head I’m thinking if I make sketches or paintings then obviously I’m no match to God’s work of art and He happens to be the best artist that ever existed so might as well just celebrate God’s masterpieces by taking photographs of it. Hmm, it’s just that I don’t have a digital camera not to mention that I don’t have a single penny in my pocket for me to buy myself one. LOL. Damn, so it seems like being unemployed has infinite downsides, huh? Damn it. LOL.

Hmm, I'm still gonna keep on saving in my coin bank in ten pesos coin denomination. Well, this time around I'm saving for the sake of saving. I mean, for now 'coz if I think it over I don't really need a new gadget. Well, I guess the best thing for me to do is to keep on doing what I'm doing which is pursuing my dream of being a writer someday even if I don't know if what I'm doing is going somewhere or not. Damn, it's not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. Hmm, I wonder if my lyric video of my song “A Broken Record” has reached another milestone on the video sharing website where I uploaded it. Well, I don't know.

It's the Only Way I Know How

Oh, so it turns out that “Heartbroken Girl” is an improved version of “Mysterious Girl”. Well, if you ask me I think my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl” is doing good so far. Hmm, it's just that I wonder until when will I be able to keep the good vibes going. Damn, I'm trying to live my life to the fullest the way I know how these days. You know what? I'm thinking my readers if I ever do have some are sick and tired of reading this but I'll write it down for the n^th time anyway. I mean, what I want to say is if I can only start earning my own dough by writing then that will surely make the whole damn world a better place to live in. Damn it. Okay, so let's just put it this way. I mean, since I just graduated in a make-believe writing course then let's just say “Heartbroken Girl” is my major project after graduation. Oh, not to mention that I still don't have a plot for the story yet. I mean, I just write down anything that pops out of my head. Damn it.

You know what? It seems like the only way I know how to realize my dream of being a writer in the real world everybody knows someday is by writing a book then sending a query to literary agents. Oh, I'm thinking in the process of writing “Heartbroken Girl” I'm gonna be like a designer working on materials and transform those materials I worked on into stylish clothing. I mean, what I'm trying to say is in the process of writing “Heartbroken Girl” I'm gonna work on my materials which are my blog book “Mysterious Girl” not to mention my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between since nothing much interesting is really going on in my super boring life not to mention that I'm such a boring person then transform those materials I worked on into a publishing worthy novel. Hmm, can you catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing by the minute? Damn, what am I saying? Well, I don't know with me. LOL.

Well, so it seems like I won't be updating my blog “Mysterious Girl” as often as I usually do. Hmm, actually I don't really know. I mean, what if something to write about pops out of my head or what. Well, I think in the coming days I'm gonna go and limit myself to writing a blog draft a day. Hmm, I guess that will make the whole damn world a better place to live in. Oh, not to mention that I'm kind of thinking twice if I'll go on promoting my lyric video of my song “A Broken Record” on a social networking site. I mean, I feel like I did my best in promoting my lyric video but my best was just not enough to achieve a thousand views for “A Broken Record” on the video sharing website where I uploaded it. Hmm, on second thought Christmas is still a few weeks away so I guess there's still enough time to realize my Christmas wish for “A Broken Record”. Okay, so I think I'm gonna go on promoting my lyric video until my wish is realized.

Damn, I don't really know if what I'm doing these days is going somewhere or not. Well, I guess the best thing for me to do is to keep on going even if the path I'm choosing to take is uncertain. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about aside from my thoughts and my feelings and anything nonsense in between? Well, I don't really know. By the way, I took portraits of myself with my laptop's webcam and did some editing or what. Hmm, it's just that it seems like my webcam's automatic photoshop really said goodbye for good. Damn, what am I talking about? I mean, I'm really running out of nonsense out here or something so just don't mind what the heck am I saying. Well, I'm thinking in some ways “Heartbroken Girl” is an improved version of “Mysterious Girl”. Hmm, it's just that I'm thinking of writing “Heartbroken Girl” in a whole new different way from “Mysterious Girl”. Damn, it's not that easy make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online, mind you. Oh, not to mention that I'm really running out of nonsense to talk about. Well, the thing is writing is my own way of living my life to the fullest for now. Oh, not to mention that I also need to highlight that I'm not writing to be a messenger 'coz I'm simply writing to express myself plus I'm not writing for anyone else in particular and that's an amen.

Something to Get Busy With

Hmm, so I began writing my new project which is my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl” by Adeline Chrystyn. Well, I don't really have a plot for the story yet. I mean, I just wrote down whatever that is that popped out of my head. Hmm, so it seems like in the coming days I'll be busy updating my blog “Mysterious Girl” from time to time and writing my new project which is my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl” whenever an idea on what to write next pops out of my head or something. Well, if my memory serves me right I read an online article saying that there's really not much dough when it comes to fiction writing 'coz the real dough is in non-fiction writing. Damn, the problem is I'm not an article writer so much more that I'm not an academic writer. You know what? I decided to work on a new book project which is my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl” is because I have a funny feeling that posting my blog drafts here on my blog “Mysterious Girl” lessens the chances of my blog book to turn into a published book.

I mean, what if the literary agent who decides to represent my blog book “Mysterious Girl” tells me to delete my blog in order for my blog book to turn into a published book. Well, the problem is I can't do that which means I'm keeping my blog no matter what. Hmm, so that's why I came thinking that the only solution to that problem is to work on a new project which is my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl”. Well, I'm just setting the number of pages to seventy these days but I'm thinking after reaching my goal of writing seventy pages then I'm gonna upgrade the number of pages from seventy to one hundred forty. I mean, I need to write 75,000 words to 120,000 words or something and I don't think I'll be able to reach the minimum number of words which is 75,000 if I limit my new book project to seventy pages. Hmm, can you catch my drift or is my grammar getting more and more confusing? Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about?

Hmm, on second thought why won't I send “Mysterious Girl” to literary agents and see what happens. Oh, not to mention that I'm thinking of upgrading the number of words to write from 97,500 to 120,000. Damn, why am I doing the Math all over again? Well, I don't know with me. I mean, I'm just thinking of writing 120,000 words to give my blog book some sort of allowance if ever the unfortunate editor who will be tasked to edit my work of art will end up deleting a lot of unnecessary words or something. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Well, I'm also thinking what if the editor will decide to rewrite my every blog post or something so it's like the the way my blog posts are written on the published version of my blog book will be a whole lot different from the way my blog posts are written in my blog but the thought is still the same. Damn, I'm thinking that will be a lot of work on the part of the editor. Oh, not to mention that I don't have single penny in my pocket to pay for the editor's talent fee or something. Hmm, whatever. Damn it.

You know what? I have to say that make-believing that I'm working as an amateur writer online isn't as easy as one-two-three, mind you. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I'm thinking why won't I be the one who will do the editing or something. I mean, I'm kind of thinking of making “Heartbroken Girl” the edited version of “Mysterious Girl”. Well, I don't really know. Hmm, on second thought I'm thinking of writing “Heartbroken Girl” in a whole new different way. I mean, if you can catch my drift. Hmm, so what else am I gonna talk about? Well, I don't really know. You know what? I don't really have that much in mind right now. Hmm, it's just that I need to conform to the standard requirement of writing a page of nonsense in every blog draft or something. Damn, I really want my blog book to look like a professional looking book. Hmm, it's just that I don't think that's possible these days. You know what? I'm kind of thinking that “Mysterious Girl” by Adeline Chrystyn is pretty damn good and so far is the best of all my literary masterpieces so I'm kind of wondering why am I thinking twice of sending my blog book or shall I say my work of art to literary agents. Oh, not to mention working on a new project which is my seventy-page book “Heartbroken Girl”. Damn it.